Wonderful Bellies and the Ways we Talk to Our Kids

Image Description: green grass with four pairs of feet, legs partially visible. One pair is my feet with black tennis shoes. Two pairs are 4.5 year old feet. One pair is 2 year old feet.

Kids notice the ways we interact with ourselves and with others.

They notice when we make comments about our bellies, about the way we handled something, the way someone else is dressed, or the way someone else acts.

How do we want our kids to interact with the world and with themselves? Do we want them to have appreciation for their bellies and understand that bellies grow and change and look different than other bellies? I certainly do!

As I grew up, I heard many comments about bodies. Much of what I heard was about wanting to change one’s body. To shrink bellies and thighs and hips. To buy clothes that slimmed and shaped. I heard judgements about other people’s bodies, their abilities, and their worthiness.

We ALL do. It’s an engrained part of mainstream American society and it stems from colonization and white supremacy.

I was unintentionally taught that my belly wasn’t lovable if it wasn’t small, thin, and toned. I was unintentionally taught that judging others could make ME feel better. I was unintentionally taught that I had to be and act a certain way to be noticed and valued. As I typped this, it feels outrageous and unreal, yet I can recall countless times when I heard the words: “At least you aren’t . . .” I don’t want this for myself and I don’t want this for my kids, the kids in my community, or ANYONE!

I love working with kids and trying my best to mirror the ways I have been learning to love and appreciate myself, and to love and appreciate others.

Note: My reflections are based on my lived experience, my education, and my research. My quality of life and overall health has improved drastically as a result of Intuitive Eating and Fat Positive education. I am deeply passionate about Fat Liberation and raising a generation of kids who listen to and trust their bodies.

A few books that I would recommend that have impacted my learning, healing, and work include The Body is Not an Apology by Sonya Renee Taylor, Fat Birth by Michelle Mayefske, Health at Every Size by Lindo Bacon, and The Anti-Diet Book by Christy Harrison.